The following bit of genius was written at the close of an open-letter response to a series of obsessive and antagonizing tweets by Deepak to Jerry Coyne.
Set to tune of “I am woman” by Helen Reddy
I am Deepak; hear me roar
As you patronize my store,
And buy up all the nostrums that I sell.
You may say that I’m a crank,
But just tell that to my bank,
For I’m Deepak, and you can go to hell.
Oh yes, I am rich,
Though it’s richness born of woo;
And for those whose life’s a bitch,
I will bilk them through and though.
If I had to, I could sell anything;
I’m a crank,
But I’m a scientist—
I am DEEPAK!
(OMG, yes, Chopra called Coyne a fundamentalist pseudoskeptic, incapable of abstract thinking. That’s ripe.)
“Not only do we not have the originals; we don’t have the first copies of the originals. We don’t even have copies of the copies of the originals, or copies of the copies of the copies of the originals. What we have are copies made later – much later. In most instances, they are copies made many centuries later. And these copies all differ from one another at many thousands of places… Possibly it is easiest to put it in comparative terms: there are more differences among our manuscripts than there are words in the New Testament.” – Professor Bart D. Ehrman, Author of Misquoting Jesus: The Story Behind Who Changed the Bible and Why
“We want to stand upon our own feet and look fair and square at the world — its good facts, its bad facts, its beauties, and its ugliness; see the world as it is and be not afraid of it. Conquer the world by intelligence and not merely by being slavishly subdued by the terror that comes from it. The whole conception of a God is a conception derived from the ancient oriental despotisms. It is a conception quite unworthy of free men. When you hear people in church debasing themselves and saying that they are miserable sinners, and all the rest of it, it seems contemptible and not worthy of self-respecting human beings. We ought to stand up and look the world frankly in the face. We ought to make the best we can of the world, and if it is not so good as we wish, after all it will still be better than what these others have made of it in all these ages. A good world needs knowledge, kindliness, and courage; it does not need a regretful hankering after the past or a fettering of the free intelligence by the words uttered long ago by ignorant men. It needs a fearless outlook and a free intelligence. It needs hope for the future, not looking back all the time toward a past that is dead, which we trust will be far surpassed by the future that our intelligence can create.” – Bertrand Russell
“I don’t know how old I am.”
“You were born in 73, so you’re 37.”
“I’m 37? Wow. I’m turning 38 this year. That’s old… why are you playing with the skin around my eyes? You trying to make a point about how old I am?”
“No. I was just wondering what you’d look like as a Vulcan.”
“It is a truism that almost any sect, cult, or religion will legislate its creed into law if it acquires the political power to do so, and will follow it by suppressing opposition, subverting all education to seize early the minds of the young, and by killing, locking up, or driving underground all heretics.” -Robert A. Heinlein [Postscript to Revolt in 2100]
Michael is a big sci-fi fan. He bought a couple new books at the bookstore today, one of which was The Year's Best SF 13. When we got home he showed it to me, I flipped it open and the first thing I read was this quote from John Kessel's The Last American:
“The great artist is a rapist. It is his job to plant a seed, an idea or an emotion, in the viewers mind. He uses every tool available to enforce his will. The audience doesn't know what it wants, but he knows what it wants, and needs, and he gives it to them.
“To the degree I am capable of it, I strive to be a great artist.”
—Andrew Steele, “Man of Steele”
Interview on VarietyNet